Well, then.

The guys on this site who actually know about Hockey are all otherwise engaged (something called “Having Lives”.. must look that up) so it’s very much down to me to recap tonight’s action.

Tonight seemed like the flip of the Calgary game: another meaningless mid-season tilt, although this time between two teams whose eyes are fixed firmly on the Playoffs, with the coin landing on the side of the OC Mallards.  It was the sort of game that you start forgetting seconds after it ends. The Hawks were not very good tonight but the Ducks were worse.. there is no sign that their regression is going to stop anytime soon, whereas the Hawks will have Sharp & Hossa to call in the near future (unless those rumours of Hoss going on IR are true: which they had better fucking not be)

Anyway, the top two teams in the West went head to head in a battle that will not resound through the ages. First period was even-stevens.. the teams exchanging a couple of chances, Kane hit a post and Brandon Saad showed us all why we love him so much by getting stuck the fuck in. . That kid has wheels, brains and balls. He’s a keeper, despite what Jackass says. Ended up 9 each for shots and, strangely, only 8/7 in favour of the Ducks at the dot.

Second period and we got Johnny O caught attempting a Hail Mary, Corey “Stump Liquor” Perry split the Swedes and scored.  He’s still an inbred-looking POS.  Patrick Kane tied it up in the 3rd with an OMActual PP Goal (first in 12 goes) before Souray banked one in off Hjalmarssson’s broken stick to give the Duc A L’Orange a regular season sweep on the Hawks. Like that means shit.


  • Normally we’d be bemoaning the Obligatory Annoying Selanne Goal. Not tonight. Do you remember hearing his name that often?
  • Ditto for Toews & Kane. Tonight was clearly not a night for the superstars (Kaner’s goal notwithstanding). Pat & Eddie were talking about “A Playoff Atmosphere” and I agree, if you replace “Playoff” with “Blah” and “Atmosphere” with “Duuuh”
  • On the subject of my favourite hybrid, Pedzo.. apparently burbling about owning horses is their new “Golf In Florida”. Waaaay to endear yourselves to a working-class fanbase, guys.  Edzo also used the non-word “Strikeabilty” which makes me want to get a large dictionary, tie it to a brick,  mail it to him, then wait in the bushes outside his house for the mailman and throw him in through the front window.
  • The PP got a goal for the first time in 12 attempts. And it sucked less than recently. At least they weren’t dumping it in continually. Although they did give Anaheim a sniff of a shortie which has become a distressing habit. Cut that shit out, guys. We’re used to the PP being awful, we don’t need it getting post-modern on us.
  • I’m not going to mention the fucking dot. Horsed again.
  • Nor entirely sure that the 4th line got any ice-time after the 1st period.. but GorillaSalad was putting himself about and nearly useful.. is there some fear of Rockford there?
  • If anyone tells you, with a straight face, that Francois Beauchemin is a Norris Candidate, walk, don’t run. If you run they’ll likely chase you down to explain why Perry is going to win the Hart every year till the Sun explodes.
  • Razor did not disgrace himself at all in his second straight start. Neither goal was on him and he pulled out a couple of excellent stops, one against Rogaine “Before” Shot Getzlaf in the 3rd that was quite special. Nice one Ray.
  • Bolland is starting to show sparks but need to do more, and soon,or he’s going to be expendable
  • Brandon Saad. My Player of the Game. That kid is well on his way to being something very, very special. If they gave the Calder out for “Playing like a fucking Man Who Belongs” rather than flashy points and such, he’d be a shoo-in.
  • Nick Leddy. He’s a young guy, learning his game.. but, damn, that kid can skate. I love how, having watched his growing pains, he’s becoming the sort of weapon we all hoped he’d become. Cam Barker is not fit to clean his skates

This was one the Hawks probably should have had, but I think we didn’t see the best of either team in a so-so game. I’d be more worried if I were an Anaheim fan because that team looks plain out of ideas. The Hawks have plenty more in the tank, with or without Sharp & Hossa.

SCUM are next, Sunday lunchtime. Will be good to get back amongst the Central again.


Let’s Go, Hawks!