The three of you can just keep walking. (Chicago Tribune)

When teams finish off the regular season hot and head into the playoffs on a role, you can throw the records and the seeds out the window. Sometimes, things inexplicably just seem to go right for said team.

Phoenix played roughly 59 and a half minutes without their leading scorer, survived a possibly deflating tying goal late in the third and beat the Blackhawks in Game 1 3-2 in overtime on Thursday night in the desert.

Radim Vrbata played all of 30 seconds before leaving with an injury, but Martin Hazal’s redirect past Corey Crawford ended up being the difference – along with some help from Mike Smith.

A series of icing calls in OT didn’t help either, the last coming from Marcus Kruger, who subsequently lost the ensuing draw to Hanzal before he scored the winner.

It ruined the comeback of Jonathan Toews, who wasted little time showing how much the ‘Hawks missed him. He scored the game’s first goal and later assisted on Brent Seabrook‘s tally with less than 15 seconds left in regulation.

So, what went wrong? A lot of things…

♦   The Coyotes’ first goal had such incredible amounts of horrendous shit happening that I can barely bring myself to discuss it. Niklas Hjalmarsson hasn’t exactly been Mr. Dependable in the last, well, most of the season, but that might have been the worst shift of his life. In a span of about 45 seconds, Hjammer made an errant pass for an in-zone turnover, whiffed on a clearing attempt, sent a blind ring around the boards, poked away a badly needed freeze from Crawford, before finally allowing Taylor Pyatt to slip behind him to knock in a goal that was all – and I mean ALL – Hjammer’s fault.

What a fucking deflating stretch that was for the ‘Hawks. And no, I won’t ignore the fact the Coyotes got away with a blatant too many men non-penalty that could’ve been called by Stevie Wonder. However, there was too much farting from Hjammer going on that it trumps those two seconds of blindness from the refs. I saw many people blaming the officiating after the game, but that’s just a poor excuse from sore losers. The ‘Hawks lost that game on their own, and it all started with Hjammer’s terrible play on this goal.

♦   If that weren’t enough, the Blackhawks got caught badly in a change, leading to known cocksucker Raffi Torres skating into the zone unabated before finding Antoine Vermette for the go-ahead goal. Hjammer is an actual human being and is not invisible, but he still parked himself in Crawford’s line of sight, allowing Vermette to blast it home.

♦   Quick give me a good reason why Sean O’Donnell played ahead of Dylan Olsen. Now, take your reasoning of, “Maybe Q doesn’t want to play so many rookies in the playoffs,” and shove it directly into your asscrack. Hurry and try and find another one. I dare you.

O’Donnell not only provided a lovely screen on the OT goal, but he was so far away from the net on an even-strength point shot that I have to wonder if he’s ever played hockey before in his life. Nick Leddy was left to deal with Hanzal in front of the crease, and that proved to be no good for anyone as Hazal got his stick on the shot and put it in.

As Nakis pointed out on Facebook, it’s time to send O’Donnell to the glue factory. Go ahead and play the “He has playoff experience!” card, too, if you wish. That’s bullshit as well. Put his old ass in the press box and call it a day. Damnit.

♦   Brandon Bollig over Jimmy Hayes in the playoffs, when teams barely drop the gloves? Yep, makes sense – for all six minutes of Bollig’s ice time. Thanks.

♦   Part of me loved the energy Andrew Shaw brought to the game. The logical part of me was screaming at him to calm the fuck down (oxymoron?). Shaw was at it before the puck even dropped and continued running his mouth throughout the game. He luckily got away with a blatant trip with about three minutes left that could’ve killed the Blackhawks’ chance to tie the game.

♦   Speaking of, when Seabrook scored that goal, not once did I think the ‘Hawks were going to lose this game. What’s got two thumbs and was very, very wrong? This guy.

♦   Once again dividing myself in two, I’m conflicted on what Vrbata’s injury may do in the grand scheme of things for this series. On one hand, if it’s serious and he can’t play, it seems to be a great advantage for the ‘Hawks with the opposition’s leading score shelved. On the other hand, the Coyotes just beat the Blackhawks by taking advantage of mistakes and getting solid goaltending from Smith. Vrbata may not have made much difference. Let’s wait for the diagnosis, I guess.

Game 2 in the desert on Saturday night. Most of the CtA crew will be out and about watching the ‘Hawks hopefully tie things up, and we’ll let you know where we’re headed if anyone wants to watch me freak out over absolutely everything that happens while drinking heavily.

Here’s Boxing…